If you passed me on the road today you probably thought I was having my own concert...cause I was! I was jamming to one of my new favorites "cowboys and angels" by Dustin Lynch. I know every word by heart and I was singing quite loudly until I realized that I was saying "her kiss is my salvation... she lives for me". Ummm...incorrect. Don't get me wrong I hope my husband is a cowboy or Tim Tebow and he thinks I'm an angel! But I also hope that my husband does not expect me to live for him and that my kiss will save him. He will be forever dissapointed...especially on judgment day! That is a ton of pressure for a girl that has never been kissed (yep almost 25...Drew Barrymore acted out my life...hopefully minus the nerdiness)!
My saved by grace feminine heart aches at such words because several times in my life I have believed them. Does my life begin when I meet the man of my dreams? Is he supposed to live for me? Well...that's the worst life! Please understand that I am not frustrated with the lyrics necessarily but the fact that we believe them. Please hear me when I say I am ALL FOR marriage! I WANT to be married! I love that so many of my sweet friends are married and getting married. Yet, I don't love that we make marriage or romance out to be something that it isn't. It can't satisfy your deepest desire for love and it does not bring ultimate purpose to your life. Maybe that is why the divorce rate is so high and the romance films are top sellers. WE want that romance. WE want someone to love us so much that they would die for us and to love someone so much that we live for them. Yet we have it all wrong! What a sorry dissapointment when we realize that we gave our life and our heart to a lie.
Yet we don't have to be dissapointed! We can have that romance... we were created to live for someone else and to yearn for that love. So often we (mostly me) think if we could just wear that white dress or just get down on one knee we would capture what our hearts so desperately crave.What we crave can only be found in the one that died for us. Satan has wrapped love into a bunch of sweetly packaged lies. That somehow someone will complete us and make life worth living. Marriage was created by God as an outpouring of the greatest love ever given to man...HIS love! It is two sinners saved by grace (sometimes a cowboy) coming together as one, promising to LIVE not for eachother but for HIM! Marriage and the period of waiting for marriage would be so different if we clung to that truth. If only we embraced even a tenth of His love for us we would be overwhelmed by HIM and the love we find in God's choice for us! His BLOOD is our salvation. He died for us and we are to live for HIM! We may be a bunch of cowboys or wannabe angels but scripture doesn't not say "I have been crucified with my cowboy or angel", nope it says "I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live but Christ who lives in me!" I can't wait to be married and spend my life with someone who sings "Jesus' blood is my salvation and I live for the Lord!"
He's Big and I'm Little,